my sister texted me this morning that she was putting hailey to sleep this afternoon.

since she'd be with her dog in her final hours all day, i told her i'd help out at the cafe today so she wouldn't have to come in.

so this was it. my sister did say yesterday she'd call the vet to make an euthanasia home visit if hailey didn't improve today. apparently her condition had gotten worse. she already couldn't walk, and seemed to have stopped eating yesterday. what percentage of dogs die peacefully in their sleep? i get the feeling that most dogs are put to sleep once they get to a point where they can no longer function. it's the sad truth of dog ownership: eventually one day you'll have to put your dog to sleep.

i was very much against the idea of owning a dog when my parents and sister got hailey back in may 2008. they did it in secret too, which made me angrier. because of that, i didn't take very many photos of hailey as a puppy. puppies grow fast too, so after a few weeks, she no longer looked like a puppy anymore. hailey ended up growing to become a good dog. she liked hiking, which revealed her herding instincts, as she made sure everyone in the part were accounted for. she was a faster runner, from her hound ancestry. she liked the snow, and water, and chasing after critters. like all dogs, she loved food, but was obedient enough that she never tried to steal food of the table. she was a gentle dog but people were sometimes afraid of her, the stigma of being a black dog.

i went running this morning, made an effort to speed it up so i could get to the cafe. along the way i picked up a stainless steel colander and a blowdryer. after returning home, i took a quick shower and biked to the cafe by 11:20am. a neighbor had tossed out a samsung HDTV, so i grabbed it. it was a samsung UN32EH4003, circa july 2012. it's only a 32" 720p HDTV, but light enough that we can potentially place it on top of the kitchen shelf. i turned it one just to make sure it was still working. it didn't come with a remote so i ordered one off of amazon for $7 (arriving saturday).

i would stay at the cafe until 4pm, which was when the vet was scheduled to arrive. all day i kept an eye on the clock, waiting for the fateful time.

by the end of the day we made about the same amount we made every day this week, so not too bad. it never got too crazy, but still busy enough so it wasn't boring. since i normally don't work on thursdays, i kept thinking it was friday. this means that i will have worked every day this week other than tuesday.

my sister's godmother showed up, to keep my sister company. but my sister wanted to be alone with her dog in her final hours, and asked her godmother to leave. my 2nd aunt also showed up, heard the news about hailey from my mother. she went to go see my sister and hailey first.

i went to go see my sister in afternoon after she told me another neighbor was throwing out mason jars. that's when i learned she'd postponed the vet appointment until 5pm, which meant i had to wait an extra hour. hailey was just lying in one of her dog beds, almost non-responsive except when she lifted her head to see who it was. i noticed it yesterday but today was more pronounced, her breathing seemed labored and ragged. she also wasn't sleeping, but had her eyes opened. she looked like she was struggling. i think she would've passed away on her own after a few days (especially since she hasn't been eating), but probably in considerable pain.

i tried one of the new tea eggs made with my home-mixed spices. it was actually pretty good, couldn't distinguish it from the store-bought spices. my mother also did a good job cracking the eggs, i couldn't tell if i did them or she did them. i mixed another 10g of tea egg spices, this time using the mortar and pestle. this could be an option if you were making a small batch of tea eggs, but i intend to mass produce these spices, and lot more easier just to use the 200W electric spice grinder, which will pulverize everything in seconds.

my father fried some pork cutlets breaded with panko crumbs. while my parents and sister's godmother ate the cutlet as-is, i shredded some cabbage, cut up som pickled daikon, and served myself some rice sprinkled with furikake.

around 4:45pm my father and i both went to my sister's place to wait for the vet to arrive. the vet came right on time at 5pm. my father returned to the cafe while i stayed behind with my sister. the vet told us what was going to happen. she'd give hailey an initial shot of sedative and painkiller, allow her to fall asleep. afterwards she'd give her a second shot that would put her to sleep forever. the vet had my sister sign some paperwork agreeing to the procedure. she also took payment for the visit, which was something like $560 (not sure how much of my sister's dog insurance would cover it).

the first shot took a few minutes to kick in. the vet said it might take 10-15 minutes, during which time we can say our final good bye to hailey. the vet had some dog treats for her, but she wasn't interested in them at all. she was panting and struggling to breathe, but after a few minutes she fell asleep peacefully, even snoring. the vet asked us to let her know when to administer the second shot. this was a bigger syringe, and applied using a small tube with a butterfly needle. she shaved a small part of hailey's hind leg to find a vein. she couldn't find one (maybe because hailey was so dehydrated), and i helped her by using my phone flashlight. she finally found a vein and started injecting the second dosage. it happened quick, in about 20 seconds, i noticed hailey's chest had stopped moving. the doctor listened to her heart with a stethoscope. a few more minutes passed and she listened again. that's when she said hailey had passed. the vet gathered up her things and took them outside, before giving us a few minutes then bringing in stretcher. she also shaved some more fur for my sister as a keepsake.

hailey's body still felt warm. her eyes were open a little bit, and her tongue was sticking out. i didn't cry when my grand uncle passed away a few years ago but cried when hailey died. of course it goes without saying that my sister had been crying all day. i know it was the humane thing to do, but the finality of it, the tremendous sense of loss was overwhelming. hailey was good dog. she lived a long life. there's both happiness and sadness.

the vet came back with a stretcher, which looked like a canvas board with straps and two wheels on one end. she was strong enough to lift hailey onto the stretcher, then tie her body down before covering her up. i helped her take hailey out of the house. the wheels was so she could wheel the stretcher into the back of her honda fit. she'd then deliver hailey'd body to a pet cremation service, who will then give my sister hailey's ashes after 10-14 days.

i helped my sister gathered up all the diaper pads around the house and throw them out. my sister said she was leaving, and said my mother promised her she'd come back and clean up her house. not sure where my sister was going, but i heard she wouldn't be back until a week later, so it looks like i'm still covering all her shifts. she basically hasn't worked for over a month, as she tended to her dog.

i went back to the cafe and told everyone what happened with the vet. i then finally returned home around 6:30pm, right when they were closing up the cafe.

antonio contacted me today. he said he still hadn't received his US visa yet, so not sure when he can come to cambridge. i told him not to worry, that i wasn't planning on renting out my spare bedroom the rest of the year, so he can have the place whenever he arrives. i also saw my psycho next door neighbor moving out some of his stuff today. i honestly thought he forgot he was supposed to move and the police would have to get involved. later in the evening i saw he was still moving, so it looks like the lights will still be one for one more night.

i thought that samsung HDTV i found today looked familiar. turns out it's almost the same model as the 32" samsung i have in my bedroom - the UN32EH4050 (which formerly belonged to my grand uncle). not sure what the difference is, but the one that i have was manufactured in october 2012, newer by a few months. the remote also has a button to light up the keys. i'm taking the remote to the cafe tomorrow to see if it'll work with the found HDTV.

i warmed up some century egg congee around 9:30pm. i have one more serving tomorrow night.