every morning this week i've woke up feeling queasy. it feels like mild food poisoning but it's just anxiety over signing the purchase agreement for the apartment in a few more days. i asked eliza hoover and klea about it, and both said they felt the same way when they bought their place. i keep on thinking to myself, "am i doing the right thing? that's a lot of money. i'm going to be in debt for the next 30 years." people have asked me if i'm excited about buying a home. the feeling really isn't excitement. i'm excitement about the independence, about living in a new place, but i'm not excited about how much money i'm going to have to shell out every month to pay for the mortgage and taxes and all sorts of other home ownership bills. i'm not scared, just kind of anxious that my life will soon change in a major way. maybe i'll be more excited once i'm actually living there. for now, i'm just counting the days before i enter this purchase agreement with both feet and ride this mystery train to porperty ownerville.

besides waking up sick every morning, i also haven't been getting a lot of sleep. it's not insomnia, i don't have trouble falling asleep, but for one reason or another, i've just been going to bed late. sunday night i only had 3 hours of sleep before going to work on monday, monday and tuesday less than 6 hours each night. hopefully tonight i can clock some better sleep hours.

today we had a summer sampler in an otherwise normal package of early spring. blue skies, white clouds, temperature in the high 60's. the kind of day that makes people worried about global warming. i personally don't believe in that stuff. and what if i'm wrong? then i'll be long dead and gone when the world becomes a desolate wasteland so i'm going to enjoy the nice weather while we still have it.

i spent the whole day coaxing amanda to come out running with me. by the end of the day when i was already to go downstairs to change into my running clothes, carrie had also expressed interested in going out as well. i left the upstairs office and noticed something was seriously wrong with the sky: it was overcasted, so thick with clouds that it looked like night. i went outside and it raining. i ran downstairs and saw that carrie had already changed into her running outfit. "okay, let's go!" i said, as amanda and carrie both expressed the same shocked look over how drenched i was. "is it rainy?" um, why, yes! but what's a little rain, right? hot summer rain, the kind that steams asphalt roads, the kind that rains but it's still sunny outside, that's okay. but in early spring, in new england, so close to the end of the day, it was cold, miserable rainy weather, no doubt about that. but i got changed anyway, had my heart set on running, i wasn't going to change my mind because of a little rain. amanda relented and got changed as well. the three of us stalled in the doorway of the office before we mustered enough bravery and started running into the cold rain.

it was carrie's first time running around the charles river, but unfortunately it couldn't have been under better circumstances. because of the weather, there weren't too many people running along the river, the lack of pedestrian activities almost seemed creepy somehow. i personally didn't mind the cold rain. maybe i'm just use to the cold by now having ran outside throughout the winter season. it might bother me if it was raining a little bit, but since it was raining a lot, once i accepted the fact that i would be totally soaked, i completely embraced the moment and purposely splashed into puddles while i ran just because i had nothing else to lose. my two running mates did not feel the same way. by the time we got to the start of the mass ave bridge, we came to a stop. i could see it in their eyes that they wanted to turn back, so i had to dig deep into my motivational speaking skills and talk them into keeping on going and finishing the course. reason gave way to persuasion and the three of us continued. at that point it wasn't the rain that was bothering us. we were all soaked anyway, that was nothing. the thing that i could've done without was the strong gusts of wind that would blow through every so often. since we were all wet, it didn't feel so good whenever there was a breeze.

slow and steady wins the race and based on that line of thinking we eventually made it to the end of the longfellow bridge. by then my arms were broken into 90 degrees bends, couldn't distinguish whether the dripping from my nose was just rainwater or something else, clothes completely soaked and sticking to my body. we were going to walk back but that took too long so we sort of half-heartedly ran back to the office, not really because we wanted to run anymore, but we would've froze if we walked and we just wanted to go back to the warmth of the office. when we finally got back, never have i been so relieved to be at work! it look a few minutes before my arms thawed out enough that i could stretch them out slowly, and a few more minutes for my fingers to defrost.

if nothing else, at least it was a run we will never forget. perhaps the most miserable run of all times i think. at least it wasn't sleeting (although amanda swears she felt a snowdrop). if this doesn't prove we're hardcore runners, i don't know what will.

afterwards, carrie dropped amanda off at the t station while she drove me back to belmont, negotiating through some nasty rainy night traffic jams.

homefront news: i finally got in contact with my lawyer today! a friend of my parents, he's been working behind the scene negotiating the fine points of the purchase agreement. my parents have sort of been acting as the middlemen, but i felt it was important i get to talk to the lawyer at least one time before we went ahead with the signing. a mild situation today as i discovered that the purchase offer contract i had signed last monday said the date of purchase agreement signing would be no later than tomorrow. that wouldn't be possible because we haven't even received the inspection report yet, the property having just been inspected this past monday. at the end of the day the broker called me seemingly distressed, said that my lawyer hasn't contacted the sellers' lawyer yet. how could that be? i already have revised copies of the purchase agreement that was looked over by both lawyers. i was confused. the broker also said the sellers don't have a copy of the floorplan of the house but they'd go to city hall and check to see if they have one on file. when i called my lawyer he said he's been in contact with the sellers' lawyer, and he was able to get me an extension on the purchase agreement until next monday. i then i called back the broker and assuaged his fears that somehow our two lawyers weren't talking.