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went to bed last night at midnight, got a good night's rest. kept on waking up every hour or so to check the time and to fall back into bed knowing that i still had a lot of hours to go before i had to wake up. no weird dreams though. i think my weird dream phase is over.

"but it's so cold outside!" i actually to prefer to run when it's cold outside. when i run my body warms up, so the frigid weather is the perfect counterbalance. in fact, i took off my hat and my gloves again, and rolled up my sleeves just because i was overheating. i feel that running during the hot summer season is actually quite stifling. i breathe better when the air is cool and crisp versus when the air is warm and humid. i only feel cold when i stop running, particularly after i've completed my course, where i'm kind of sweaty. today was another 30's degrees day, so a lot of people were out. not so good for walking around, but perfect for running. i feel like everyone can run faster than me. i'm always getting passed, and the only people i run by are those who are walking to begin with. i keep on telling myself it's not a contest, but i'd be lying if i said my heart doesn't sink a bit when somebody goes by me. for the most part, it's usually men, because those are the ones with something to prove. i think they take great personal satisfaction in outrunning others. i'm not running to be fast, i'm running to survive. my blood pressure's gone down to normal, and whether it's the running or the drugs or both i can't be sure, but if it means i'm going to live past my 40th birthday without experiencing a heart attack or a stroke, i guess i could make that sacrifice and go out running whenever i can. when i came back from my run, carrie was gracious enough to pick me up a turkey sandwich from kendall's house of pizza.

when i left the office and got to the kendall square t station, i saw alex waiting for the train on the opposite platform. i tried to get his attention using mind powers but to no avail (it's time to admit that i have no mind powers to speak of). he was reading (he's one of those). not a small paperback either, but a large hardcover affair that he had to hold with two hands, a tome.

oh, and eliza wore red pants again today. i'm probably making all the ladies at work self-conscious because i make such a big deal out of it, but for me, it is a big deal. she told me that she saw a lot of people wearing red pants down in nyc this weekend. really? when everyone's doing it, it's time to start a new trend. i fear these are the waning days of red pants' superstar status. what will take the place of red pants?